The holidays can bring feelings of joy, merriment, and excitement. But many people experience increased anxiety, stress, and loneliness during the holidays. If you’re struggling this time of year, you’re not alone.
We talked with some of Lena Pope’s family therapists about how to navigate the holidays when things feel tough.
Shana Hazzard, LCSW-S, Director of Counseling and Substance Use Services, gave us several items to keep top of mind:
- Acknowledge your feelings and allow yourself to “feel your feelings”
- Reach out to a trusted friend or family member to talk
- Try socializing
- Listen to your body and be sure to get enough sleep, hydration, exercise, and nutritious food
- Practice mindfulness (there are many apps and other free resources)
- Consider volunteering
- Avoid drugs or alcohol, and
- Develop a plan for if you get ‘too’ down and have thoughts of suicide or self-harm
Lauren Doane, LCSW, had some great tips for the stresses of holiday preparations, sadness, and creating boundaries with loved ones.
If you’re stressed out over holiday shopping, making your famous eggnog cookies for the 7,354,906th time, getting the house ready for company, or anything else that can make the holidays feel a little less “merry and bright”, try taking a moment to write a gratitude list. Research has indicated that cultivating a grateful mindset can help reduce depression and anxiety symptoms.
If the holiday season brings forth some not-so-pleasant emotions due to loss (through death, divorce, abandonment, by choice, etc.), consider creating some new traditions that are unique to you and/or your chosen family. Don’t want to celebrate Christmas? Make it a day to cozy up with your favorite takeout and watch your comfort shows. Feeling lonely? Volunteer at a local shelter or hop on “Meet Up” and find some like-minded individuals to spend the holidays with.
If spending time with your family is inevitable and leaves you feeling drained, consider establishing some boundaries around that time. For example, set a timer on your phone in 30-minute increments or so, and once the alarm sounds, take a 15-minute break. Go outside for some “fresh air”; take the dog for a walk; take an “urgent phone call”; whatever you need to do (within reason, of course) in order to rejoin the fray!
Julie Foster, LCSW, added that if you’ve experienced a loss recently, or even not so recently, you can try to find a tradition your loved one enjoyed that you feel comfortable carrying on in their memory. This can help you continue to feel their presence and make them a part of the holidays, but in a different way. On the other hand, sometimes it may be helpful to create a brand-new holiday tradition you are excited about and find joy in.
Remember, holidays don’t have to be perfect and it’s ok to feel lots of different emotions including joy this season. We hope you’ll try some of these tips or share them with someone who might be struggling this time of year.